A winter hibernation would really be so wonderful.

Just so you know, I am aware that it’s been around 6 months since my last post. I’m actually surprised that people seemed to like my post about EX-ARM; I didn’t realize I was that alone in my opinion of it. I have about 12-13 drafts of ideas for posts that have been sitting idly in my dashboard, and it’s like I can never seem to progress any further in them because of some silly little reason.

There’s also the matter of more things happening in real-life. Family loss, breakups, and me getting more sick. It’s like these 2 years have been really sucky for all of us, and even though I seem to have all the time in the world to complete these 12-13 drafts and make them actual legitimate posts to go on here, I still feel this real sense of laziness. This coupled with the anxiety I had means that I can’t put pen to paper and finish these 12-13 drafts.

If you’re even interested, these drafts range from me talking about shows like Wonder Egg Priority and the Mahouka spin-off show, to me having the stupid idea of doing an update for the Happy Science post that is actually first page if you google ‘Happy Science anime’ – is that even meant to be an accomplishment? There are some other stuff too, that actually don’t make me think that they’re terrible post ideas that I would later regret. I suppose I just need the poke to go and actually do them…

…but when all you want to do is sleep.

I do admire a lot of other anime bloggers out there who are able to keep to some kind of good schedule and pump out high quality posts on a regular basis. Perhaps because my life no longer revolves around anime, I can’t see myself being that kind of anime blogger anymore. My OASG column is something that keeps me going, and I have also returned to the UK-based review site Japan Curiosity, where I’m back to reviewing Netflix anime shows.

Nostalgia in anime has never really been something I jump to; the reason behind this is I think because I’ve been covering new anime seasons for so long, and I seldom ever pause and take the time to watch a show at my own pace, as opposed to week-by-week. The question is whether I ever want to keep on with this coverage, or to just stop and watch shows whenever I choose. To some people, the answer is probably very simple, and it might just be something I can’t quite see.

I’m writing this post at 3am, just so you know; hence the garbled text. I’ll think of a way around this pause/stoppage/whatever it’s supposed to be. I know it.

In EX-ARM’s defense.

Oh, I know what you’re thinking. “EX-ARM? A good show?! How dare you!!!” Well, at least what I would think when this is casually brought up in conversation or in social media threads. But I believe that this argument has far more weight than you’d think. As anime followers, it seems like we have become so conditioned to big-budget shows that have the backing and support of not just high-profile staff and voice actors, but loyal fanbases both in Japan and in the West as well, as well as media coverage and airtime. I’m talking about the big name shows of My Hero Academia, Attack on Titan, Madoka Magica, Sword Art Online, and so on. Not just this too; the standard when it comes to anime movies has become much higher as time as gone by. We’ve seen whimsical pieces like the Studio Ghibli movies of My Neighbor Totoro and Kiki’s Delivery Service be replaced by fancier and glossier epics like your name, Maquia and Weathering With You. Glitches and mistakes in shows (whether they be animation, script, or anything else) have become easier to spot, and in turn become something that the followers can scrutinize and shit-talk for days. Time goes by, and animation gets better – of course it does, why wouldn’t it? So perhaps this is a reason why EX-ARM was so universally panned. But some people see it as the sole reason for why the show should be on every ‘Worst Anime Shows Ever’ list. So is it really down to the poor animation, and only that?

(This would be the part where I say this post has spoilers for the show, but to be honest, what’s the point?)

Shimamura’s Catch-22.

You either found her extremely fascinating or extremely frustrating. Shimamura was someone who divided opinion when Adachi & Shimamura came out. With so many yuri shows that came out with couples being very open about their relationships and romances, Adachi & Shimamura was unique in that it presented a much more realistic scenario; girls that aren’t the popular type at school who have their own views on the people around them. Adachi becomes the one who effectively makes the first move, and so when people saw Shimamura’s apparent lack of response, they got fairly frustrated. A girl is in love with her, and she doesn’t respond? Other yuri shows like Bloom Into You and Sakura Trick saw couples who openly accepted each other, sometimes immediately, with their later episodes going into further detail on how their romance blossomed. So because Adachi & Shimamura was such a slow burn show, that may have been the reason why viewers’ frustration may have been misplaced.

Only a slow burn could work for a show like this, because both of them weren’t completely open with their feelings from the get-go. In fact, it wouldn’t be until around halfway through until we got to see more from Shimamura’s perspective, and how she really felt about her new best friend. The show is, for the most part, told from Adachi’s point-of-view, and so in the moments where we get to see things through Shimamura’s eyes are things that form our opinion of her as a whole. Most of our focus would be watching Adachi and her puppy love, but while all of this was happening, we never got to see much of how torn Shimamura is…

(This post contains spoilers for Adachi & Shimamura)

A roadmap.

Delay, delay, delay, delay. Why do I even bother sometimes?? I look at this blog and I see the last post was back in November, when I talked about my messy breakup with the UK con scene, as well as questioning why I should still be an anime follower anymore. That post was more of an emo whine post than be something that fits into the ‘philosophy, reviews and obscure shows’ hole. Honestly, I do try and make an effort to think of decent topics to talk about here. I convince myself that my hands are full (with my regular posts on OASG), when in all reality, I have all the time in the world…and I just choose not to go to my keyboard and type. And even if posts I write end up incurring wrath, like back when I wrote a Darling in the Franxx post saying that Ichigo was infinitely the better choice for Hiro, and got it bad from the Zero Two stans. I don’t like to think I have a blabbermouth, but I look back on posts like that, and then I think perhaps I shouldn’t just type and type without a care (and actually draft my posts like a proper writer would) so much. Because if I stop to think whatever crap comes out of my head and makes it onto the computer screen, I wouldn’t get as many hate comments. Sounds simple, right?

Who I am.

Alright, this post was meant to go out a good month ago, and I have no reason for delaying it. I’m just a terrible blogger, with no real plan or schedule set in stone.

With my Revue Starlight post project over, I should be thinking about finding another show I used to hate and do some elaborate group of posts about it. In the last month or so, I’ve been preoccupied with something else though: how I come across to others.

Not exactly an anime topic, but anime is something that is a part of who I am, who I was, and likely who I will end up being in the future. I’ve been watching all sorts of shows and movies for over 20 years now. But after these long 20 years, it now feels like something that I can just give up tomorrow. I could easily wake up tomorrow morning and say to myself that I can no longer take any of this anymore, and find some other hobby/pastime to occupy myself. In these last years, I’ve often called myself ‘jaded’ or ‘disillusioned’; I suppose by this I mean that a lot of things in this anime generation are things that I just cannot get into or understand. But at the same time, I’m not exactly someone who yearns for the old shows and looks down on new seasons. So what’s the issue? What is it that’s eating away at me?